Favourite Stupid Email

All right, each post on this thread should have the exact quote of a stupid email you have received from a stranger. I get so many but this one I received this morning just made me snort. I have a website. I sell cows and beef, sheep and lamb, pigs and pork, turkeys and chicken.

Here's the e-mail, now I'm deleting the original:

"do you have some animals ready to butcher this summer/fall? homw much ?"

Charming, no?

OK, I am game. I got this one a while back. One sentence. "Are you having puppy's?" Ignoring the ill placed apostrophe I quashed the urge to reply, "No, as a human being I am not equipt for that function."

Extra points for bad grammar/poor spelling!

The best one I have had is when I listed my Corvette for sale with a picture posted on the ad and I recieved an email asking me what color is the car?

This is a compilation of several adds that a friend of a friend put together. Yes everything in here is from Horse for sale adds on line various places.

For sale
3 yr old unregistered ApaWab gelding.
Will mature to 14.3-16h. Potentialy safe as a pet horse but most suitable as a heard disturber. Not good with dogs but has not yet stepped on a chicken so would maybe love children. Lehrman has been saddled twice, may be halter broke and will load his friend into the trailer. He is a beautifully colored chestnut turning grey - dress him in hot green and WOW. He will get you noticed an any show ring, pasture, roadway or auction grounds and then also go any other direction as well . Never bites or kicks but when he does it will eventually heal. I have owned him for one day. Sadly for sale due to owners mental health issues.
$8000 or will trade for truck and trailer package 2010 or newer

Note. ( price will decrease with further neglect and weight loss

What about phone calls?

Daughter has a summer job at a garden center. Yesterday, someone called and asked how many plants were in a six-pack.

Fowler wrote:What about phone calls?

Daughter has a summer job at a garden center. Yesterday, someone called and asked how many plants were in a six-pack.

LOL

However I can say, the nursery I buy from has 1-2 (when I buy them) plants per plug, so sometimes more than 6

One of my choice ones was when someone asked me if the hen would bite them if they were gathering eggs when she was in the nest box. I mentioned this before and got some weird answers from my forum friend, ROTFLMAF, now how's that one? I am really not sure what the person was thinking, but it thunderstruck me. I got the distinct impression they wanted to get the eggs the second they were laid and did not want to wait until the hen left the nest. Fortunately I have not had very many weird emails, but then don't do a whole lotta selling either. Wouldn't want to be someone that had to deal with many many requests a day from selling on the internet. Have beautiful days, CynthiaM (wouldn't it be nice if our rains would stop, just for a few days, sigh, and blah...had enough rain already!)

The latest that I have seen is cocomaroons (makes me think of a tasty cookie) and isla chickens, but I often see quater horses & apiloosa (or other misspellings of the same), among other things. When I worked at a nursery, I was told that I hear about cotton easters (cot-tone-y-aster), & jupiters (junipers), and I DID. I really have to remind myself that it wouldn't do any good to tell them...they would only get offended (just carry on...), or I did say kindly, "Oh, you're looking for a (place correct pronunciation here)." or take them to it and say, "Here is the (name) you are looking for."

Do these people placing the ads just not take the time to know what they have? When I sell, I take enough pride to know what I have and pass the correct name and important relevant knowledge on to others.

Rant...I find most people don't take the time to observe and/or listen to/think through much anymore, whether it be old people or young. Along the same lines...our daughter's name is another example. There is no "d" or "s" in it. Yes, I understand that it is not a common name, but it is an old and not made up one. It is short and simple...straight forward, sounding as it is spelled. Somehow they still put a these strange letters in it, or change her name completely...repeatedly...even if we emphasize the letter, or say her name louder, repeat it for them a few times and/or spell it out too. LISTEN people and learn. Take a few seconds and get these things right. It isn't rocket science. They can get our other daughter's name correct, and it rhymes. Only the beginning sound is different. End of rant.

Not long ago, I was so tired from whatever was happening around me that I replied to someone saying when our ducks were "born." Oh my...that type of thing irks me...and then I became guilty of it myself.

My DH loves hearing about "baby calves," like there are any other kind?

Now back to the OP's comment...I most likely have sent a few stupid emails in my time. I try to review before sending, but I am sure I don't catch everything. Hopefully the one on the receiving end had a chuckle and then carried on...

A new one last night: "Offsprey"...

But you are right, niglefritz, we all make mistakes sometimes, I try not to be super critical but really.. sometimes it is just too funny not to share!

Hmmm. Were people eating the box? You have to wonder!!!

Uhhh...this pizza tastes like cardboard...

I read this on a sticker on the back of a stop sign in a college parking lot:

"Please recycle this sign."

Um, okay...if you insist...Don't mind me, I am only obeying the traffic sign...

Reply to my chicks for sale ad yesterday:

Still avail? Can come tomorrow. Karen 778-***-****

So I call her today. She says, "I am in the middle of moving today. Maybe in a couple of days?"

Idiot!

Oh, oh, I have a new one!

My little daughter wants to see some eggs hatching.
we need a broody hen for up to $10 - 15
we live in surrey, Guildford mall area.
if you have one please call us


I guess whatever little daughter wants, little daughter gets, but as cheaply as possible?