Hip surgery recovery help!

WIthin the next 2 weeks our neighbour, who is 88, is going in for hip replacement. His caregiver will be his 86 year old wife. She is frail.

I am driving him to the hospital and was to drive him home after surgery. I am extremely concerned about this! He cannot get up into my Jimmy when all his parts are in good working order. I have no idea how I am going to get him in there with one leg all gimpy. ALso my truck is old, a 1986, it rides like a lumber wagon! It is going to jostle and jar the poor guy to pieces!

If I get him in the truck and if the ride home doesn't kill him, there are two flights of stairs to get him up to get him into the house. I am freaking out over this!

Yesterday I got ahold of the Medi-Van, a service that will bring you home in a position that is not bad for your new hip and two people will cart you up the stairs into your house. You pay for this service but it's well worth it. We told Neighbour that we would pay for it if he felt he could not. I just do not want to be responsible for causing him pain or injuring a precarious hip transporting him home.

Would the old guy go for this Medi-Van? Not a hope in hell. No way. He's going to be fine. He'll just hop up in my truck and off we'll go, he sees no reason to need a special van. I am begging him, pleeease use the van, at least let them get you in the house in one piece. Nope. Forget it. He doesn't need it, he'll be right as rain. HE'S NOT RIGHT AS RAIN NOW!

He deicdes to get someone else to bring him home, someone else with a truck (perhaps lower to the ground, but still trucks are big and Neighbour is a small guy). Now I feel like a heel, like he thinks I didn't want to help him. I most certainly DO want to help, but he will NOT listen to a word of advice. His wife is not up to this taskm and yet he insists that she is. There is home help avaialbe but no way he will allow anyone in his home, he is convinced that his little, wobbly wife will be able to help him with everything PLUS do all the cooking and cleaning.

I see a bad outcome. Maybe I am being paranoid. If you have any adice, guidance or experience with this situation, any idea what I can do to help, let me know. I am very worried about this!

I can understand your worry! Fortunately there is not much time between surgery and being up and walking after your hip replacement. Usually 12-24 hours and physio is riding your butt like a heeler herding cattle. The most important thing is to not bend your hip past 90 degrees, cross your legs or twist your body (nose over your toes at all times). There are also home exercises to do, but the faster someone is up and moving the better. As long as there is a raised toilet seat and pillows on the chairs at home so he's not sitting too upright, things should be ok. Do they have kids that could hip-proof the house with the toilet seat, etc? Fingers crossed that all goes well!

There are no kids, no family. We are the closest to family they have in town . They do have relatives in a different town.

He's just so independent. To his credit he got himself a walker and grabber thingy and raised toilet seat. He feels that he does not need a chair for the shower but will instead take sponge baths for the next 6 weeks. I have promised to throw him on the lawn and turn the hose on him.

THe Mrs. does not drive and he won't be driving for several weeks, so I will either be delivering groceries or taking her out to get them. Getting her in my truck is a process, but I take a step stool and that helps. Plus her hips both work! I just worry very much that this is going to be the end of her. Perhaps she's tougher than she looks. I hope so!

pillow between knees when getting into, outa bed, and like amanda said dont over bend it! i worked in a subacute unit for 9 years working with people with hip/ knee replacements, the more exercise and moving they do the better off for them even though it hurt syour better off moving, waling around then laying there

Step dad had a hip replacement just a little younger. I think the lower vehicles are harder, mostly to get out of. Depending of course on just how short he is.

Nope you are not paraniod Uno just went through this in June 2012 with an 84 yr old neighbour who lives by herself and keeps 30 head of cattle[still].Her hip replacement was 1 hr 55 min the first time and 3 hrs and 50 mins the second time!!!! Not so much fun.Its called hard love,but having knowhow is everything and sometimes good decisions have to be made regardless of opinions of others.After the second surgery,it became much easier to help her,but that is acruel way to learn.Stick to your guns!!!!! Cal

What about a step stool to get in and out
of the truck. I had one for my son's truck
when he lifted it and the bottom of the door
was at my chest.

Very generous of you to offer to pay for the van. But now he's getting another ride. I don't see what else you can do. Can't tell a Heinz pickle nuthin.

The good news is that the recovery should be fast. My father had it done and he was loads better within a couple of weeks.

I'm pushing 70 and do not have big medical problems with hips or knees. I occasionally have knees that are a bit sore. A car is difficult getting out because my knees must be bent too far for comfort. I can climb into and out of a lift truck easier than a car. Our mini van is easy, but the door opening is lower than my neck likes as I'm tall through my back. From my mother's two hip replacements she found it easier immediately after surgery than before.

Could they make a temporary bedroom downstairs until the hip has healed? The exercises are really important, last year a client had hip surgery and it was a struggle to get her to do the exercises. It took her a long time to recover. Her 2nd surgery she did the exercises religiously and the recovery time was much shorter. Another thing that came in handy was a metal "grabber" to reach things in the cupboard so he didn't have to stretch. They are lucky to have you Uno.

Cuckoo, he does have a metal grabber thing. Their basement is a storage area and cold, could not be a bedroom, no plumbing.

I think he will be good about doing his exercises, he's pretty regimented and rigid and very good at following orders if he thinks they come from someone with authority. Like his Dr. But if anything goes wrong...there is going to be trouble. All I can do is stick close to home for a couple of weeks and keep checking in on them.

Thank you all. Fingers crossed

I so own the T-Shirt with this one.
Uno, don't feel guilty. You did what you thought was right. This gentlemen has made his decision on what he wants. Despite what you may think, even if you believe you have his best interest in mind, he is capable of making his own decision. Even at 88.

I go through the same thing with my 80 year old dad. Went through hell that nearly put me in the hospital with a breakdown because I would try to help Dad. No matter what I would suggest to help dad before his knee surgery, it was always wrong according to him. So when dad would fall flat on his face because insisted on using a cane instead of a walker, all I could do was struggle to get him back on his feet and then listen to him blame his knee for his troubles. Then when dad got the surgery for his knee, all I could do is listen while he blamed the surgeon for not doing the surgery right on his knee. I have stopped pointing out to dad that maybe the fact he refused to do any of the therapy and that he insists on laying in bed all day around the clock may have something to do with his knee still not working right.

When I talked to his doctor about it all, all his doctor can tell me is it's dad's choice. There
is little anyone can do. It's the same thing with that elderly gentlemen you are trying to help.
If they don't want the help, there is little you can do about it. So don't feel bad. You tried.

Hey Uno, sorry, I should have said the main floor, now the lower floor...my brother-in-law made a temporary bedroom on the main floor of their house as he knew that he would find the stairs hard to go up and down in the first weeks. Also the client was brought down to a 1st floor bedroom from the 2nd floor for 8 weeks as she healed. This might be possible with your neighbour only if there is a bathroom on the same floor or if he doesn't mind a urinal/bedpan which can be borrowed from the hospital.