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An essay on deleting.

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1 An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 1:06 am

uno

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Not a rant, an essay. Not intended in any way to oppose or challenge Hidden's decisions. She steers the ship and has choices she has to make.

But since I am a notorious deleter, for me this whole issue hits close to home. It made me sit back and think, dare I risk posting with the same freedom and abandon and eye for 'slice of life' amusement that I usually do? Maybe it's time to edit myself, and edit out how I express myself here. After all, this is not a Blab Your Face Off Therapy site. It's a poultry site. Says so at the top of the page, right up there in the black heading box.

Out of respect for Hidden's vision and work, I may have to change my ways.


There have been a couple of times when I was desperate to delete something and begged Hidden to please do so on my behalf. She always has, for which I am very grateful.

Aside from that, when I delete I make every effort to do so BEFORE anyone posts. But sometimes I can't get back to the site in time and someone has already made a reply. In that case, when I go back in to edit heavily, I DO make an effort to put something up saying that I have deleted, or to make a post further along explaining what is going on. I hope that I have never blipped off into space without a word. (although I might have and just don't remember it)

Also, there is a difference, I think, in posts that get into the meat of a poultry related subject, and posts that are just personal slices. I think we all come here with poultry and farming and rural life as our main goal and those things are the big attractions. I do find it interesting to know what's going on in people's lives too, because as much as I can know people through this medium, I have come to care about all these familiar names. But I think edit/delete of personal life is NOT the same as edit/delete of poultry related materials.

No one has ever gotten smarter over anything I've written about my HD or my personal hatred of large, ugly firewood, or my personal relationship with the big man upstairs, Gordon. These posts are NOT the meat of this site, not the point of this site and their loss is of little consequence aside from perhaps lost amusement.

Therefore, I feel that personal tidbits should be viewed with more leeway towards deletion than true issues. A debate about, say, animal rights is broad in its scope and exists beyond the borders of this site and what we say about that should stay up because that is an applicable, large topic in which all our voices add up to something bigger. But writings, such as my own , are small and not part of a bigger picture, just slices of my own little bit of life. In the overall scheme, their deletion is no big loss.

Please do not post and say how much you enjoy my writing. While I will be flattered, it also is missing the point. The point is that not all posts are created equal. Some we can lose and some create a jarring mess when we lose them.

Also there is motive (this also applies in murder mysteries) Do you delete out of anger? Or do you delete out of shame and a sense of regret over hasty words? That one is usually me. I have also deleted if I think my words are overly hurtful to someone (except current boyfriend of HD). While I want to express my opinion, even if it disagrees with someone, I do not want to do so in a way that is hurtful. If I think my words read wrong when printed, I want them gone. There is nothing to be gained by leaving up words that missed the mark and made someone feel bad. I have, at times, made a PM to someone if I think I have overstepped my bounds and created bad feelings. That is never my goal. And in those cases I would hope I could delete.

While I completely understand why Hidden has to request that we not run about madly deleting, shooting her site full of holes so it reads like Swiss cheese, I am also very sobered and yes, inhibited by this request. I understand it, I understand the need for it, and understand that large parts of what I post here maybe shouldn't be posted here anymore. And that is not to be blamed on anyone but me. I have used this place as my personal vent/blog/therapy. A use for which it was never intended. This is my own fault and if I feel smacked on the knuckles, I truly have it coming.

I would hope, as Hidden suggests, that we all think before we post. I would hope that none of us remove our posts because we are mad over something. But I do think we should still be able to remove a post that was made in haste, or maybe hurts someone's feelings unduly. (sometimes you can't help hurting someone's feelings, but it must be done with grace and as gently as possible). I don't know. I won't leave my yard without a seatbelt on, to be safe. I post knowing I had a delete/edit button, to make me safe. And while we should never need it, if we post responsibly, it's nice to know it's there if once in a while, our posts find us in the ditch.

I write this because this is, for me, sobering and I think it's time I got sober. drunken 

2 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 9:50 am

Guest


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I think it's time you looked seriously into starting that blog, Uno.  That way you have full control over the content and can edit/delete/correct at will.

I hear you on the rest of it - that sometimes you need to "temper" rather than dismember a post.  I believe at this point we all have that privilege returned to us, with a reminder to use it wisely.

3 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 12:15 pm

authenticfarm

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I am glad to have edit/delete back. I wouldn't have lasted long without them.

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4 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 12:36 pm

appway

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Uno Your post are fine I am not the best speller either and like you I speak truth and if it bothers some so be it
I would rather read a full post that people have posted on instead of a post where parts are deleted because a person does not like what was said or does not like truths I always enjoy your post as they are alot like mine I know what they mean even if others dont
Keep on posting as I am sure you will

And like you said Hidden will delete something if you ask her she has always been good about it



Last edited by appway on Mon Jan 06, 2014 12:38 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : added more)

5 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 3:50 pm

coopslave

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Uno, I read this in the morning before I left for work. Glad to see it is still here.  Very Happy 

6 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 4:44 pm

uno

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Coopslave...smarty pants.

7 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 5:06 pm

bcboy

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This little forum is not the one too worry about....
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8 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 5:33 pm

Magdelan

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I have a facebook account but don't put pictures up, only a couple but nothing that shows me or my family. I think I may delete it soon. When my hotmail account insisted I have a back up email account and threatened to lock me out if I didn't put one up, or my phone number I ended that account. I may do the same for gmail if it gets too nosey, and pay for an email account that doesn't require me give out all my personal information. When that happens for all email accounts I will reconsider entirely my situation online. I am sure "they" know more than enough about me already but at some point I may have to flip the establishment the bird on what I consider an intrusion in to my personal life. sorry, little bug bear with me  Twisted Evil .

Uno I enjoyed your essay, your feisty mind/self is refreshing.

kids just home. food to get - making pasties.

9 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 5:35 pm

coopslave

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uno wrote:Coopslave...smarty pants.

 Wink 

10 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 9:26 pm

uno

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Magdelan, I have wondered how I feel about 'them' having so much information about me. But I guess it doesn't bother me much. The truth is, I don't think I have any secrets. My life is pretty much lived right out there, for everyone to see. I picture myself in some interrogation room some day where a short, fat man with a thin, cheesy moustache and ill fitting military jacket tries to intimidate me with his vast knowledge of my personal life.
"Vee have inforrrrmation on you, Uno. Do you know zees?"
" Yeah. So?"
"Vell, vee can tell cerrrtain people cerrrtain things zat vould make zem verrrry unhappy vit you!"
"Yeah. So?"
"Unt you, Miss Uno, vil be in vun beeg vat load of trrrouble!"
"Yeah. So?"
"Forr example, vee can tell zee world zat your only daughter, the one known as zee Horse, ees living vit shum stooped guy! Vould you like zee vurld to know theese?"
"Uhh, you better check my WCPS posts, the world already 'knows zees."

I guess I am not easily embarrassed. If there is a stupid story to tell on me, I tell it myself. Thus I have been fairly immune to the threat of personal revelation, since I am my own worst enemy in that regard. So 'agencies' can collect all the data they want, but how it can be used against me, if at all, is a mystery to me.

I do however feel a certain ownership of everything I write and I think copyright laws are being infringed on by these sites who pretty much say they own our content to use as they see fit. That is theft as far as I'm concerned and that offends me way more than thinking someone is collecting data on me.

I do not recall reading any fine print when I joined WCPS, I do not recall if this site claims ownership of written posts or not. I don't even know where to look.

11 Re: An essay on deleting. on Mon Jan 06, 2014 9:37 pm

KathyS

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I think Uno's got a good point about the kinds of topics where deleted posts really make a difference, and that's the topics on livestock, genetics, animal health issues, breeding practices, breed discussions etc. People come here specifically to search out this kind of information. It must be frustrating to think you've tracked down what you are looking for, only find the thread disjointed and shot full of holes. Its also unfair to the members who have contributed their time and expertise to discussions just to have them become jumbled bits and pieces. The personal stories are fun and entertaining, but if parts are missing it probably doesn't inconvenience people too much.

http://www.hawthornhillpoultry.com

12 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 12:23 am

Magdelan

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Uno you are a very expressive writer. vivid streams of experience flowing out onto the page - personal experience is just the best source for inspiration. Your memoirs would be a great read I think. I can get easily embarrassed but experience has led me to know that the sooner I eat that frog and deal with it the better. Tell on oneself, good idea, I like that - who else do we have to reckon with in the end anyway?? But I might be a bit more private I think, I tell on myself to myself behind a door until I got a good grip on things. Just my way.

I think my beef with "them" is that I see them as part of a bigger institution that wishes to control and exploit us and that is a whole kettle of fish that I am quite happy to stay out of right this moment. I didn't see any fine print on here saying I was giving my soul to the nasties either :-).

I appreciate KathyS's thinking too. There are lots of posts on here I mean to revisit when I need to, know they are here (or hope they still will be) for when they are more relevant - like the diatomaceous earth stuff - I just got some to put in my coops but want to revisit what others have done before I go ahead, see if I've missed anything beforehand and get a full picture. Like to do my research fully and this kind of information is primarily why I joined this forum, desperate for the breadth of wisdom and knowledge that is expressed here - often can't find it in a text book, everyone had different things to offer and different circumstances surrounding their situation so it is an excellent place for newbies like me as I try to piece together the puzzle.

13 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 11:39 am

uno

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Magdelan, you make me think. You say thought provoking things.

WHy do I blab about my own stupidity and be the first to embarrass myself? I think it's my take on life  and humanity. Despite what some people want to think, humans have more in common than we think. Focusing on our differences creates divides that are artificial. But  whether you are a housewife in rural BC, or some high faluttin, suit wearing, overpaid lawyer on Wall Street, we can BOTH drop our contact lens down the bathroom sink...those foibles share a humanity. And a meal shared tastes better than a meal eaten alone.

I think to connect with someone, they have to be able to look at you and recognize in you something that has happened to them. Brotherhood in this journey. Tragedy often pulls people together. That is why some communities, after a huge disaster, are better, stronger, more cohesive  in subtle yet meaningful ways. But we do not have to wait for a tragedy to be our shared experience. Daily life and the annoying, stupid things that happen to us all can bring us together and send us off into our day knowing it's not just us, we are not alone. Other people spill their coffee in the car on the way to work. We're all in this together, and it's those who want to NOT be part of it that cause others, and themselves, so much harm.

As to be exploited by outside forces, I think anyone investing a lot of exploit energy in me will be very disappointed in their return. Not to say it won't happen. Might even be amusing! I suppose some societal groups (like the young, not smart yet very wealthy) might be wheedled out of their money, so exploiting them might be profitable. But at this age, with my limited income, I think I'm no one's target audience. (they don't know what they're missing!)

I keep hijacking my own threads! See, this one is pointless and really ought to be deleted just to save everyone the time of reading it and saying, gee, Uno is particularly pointless today!

14 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 1:04 pm

Magdelan

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maybe you are an extrovert? this is a safe kind of place to get your "stuff" outside so you can look at it. I always thought of myself as introverted but guess I'm changing a bit. I used to paint and found when I looked at my painting to see what it looked like, you know, step back and check it out kind of thing so you can see what might need work, I was too "close" to it and couldn't see squat but if I held it up in the mirror I would often see a whole new picture. My way of getting some distance in order to see more clearly. Actually I use email like that too. If I have an issue with someone I write the email - usually all the unvetted stuff, hurtful, poke in the eye, how I feel in all its rawness and if I have the where with all I save it and look again a bit later and modify. That would be my edit/delete option I guess. Often it goes through a total make over until it is still saying what I mean but not in a euthanising way! Actually, when I do that it allows me to evolve how I really feel and learn from my experience. This is honestly what happens for me, I guess I take it fairly seriously because I never like to hurt people, like you talk about. Lot of this is familiar when I think about your process on this whole thing. Very familiar!

I don't know, I always want to take responsibility for my "stuff" and if I can do it without bringing people in to it and tangling them up in it with me then I try to but I think Shakespeare said something about all the world being the stage and we are the players on/in it. Didn't he say that? probably more eloquently. what I mean is that for me to have my learning I need the experience and that means other people to play their parts so they have to also be on the stage with me - not sure if that makes sense but how difficult is it to learn about myself without other people participating in my drama? pretty damn hard. guess they want to learn about themselves too. sort of, how can we have a victim without a tyrant and vice versa. Better get on with jobs. thought provoking post for sure :-).

15 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 2:49 pm

uno

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Ah..Magdelan...you did it again!

Like you, I also pour my raw feelings out in prose. However, I often hit the SEND button before I take the time to rethink, rewrite and calm down. The saying, "Act in haste, repent in leisure" very much applies to my hot tempered self. As a result, now and then I find myself having said (written) something that I would NOT have said, had cooler heads prevailed. Not that my feelings really change, but how I choose to express them does change when I cool down. Instead, I just hit send as I mutter the words, TAKE THAT, YOU TURD!

I am not an extrovert. I used to think my boisterous, loud personality made me an extrovert. Wrong. It just means I'm loud and boisterous. I function pretty well in most social situations. Can make idle chit-chat with strangers. In fact, I am that annoying person in the post office or coffee shop who strikes up a conversation with people around me. However, I GUARD MY PERSONAL SPACE AND TIME WITH RIGID VIGILANCE. I can function very well around people, but require huge amounts of down time, quiet time, alone time, silence in order to recharge my batteries. That is what determines whether you are an introvert or extrovert. Not how you act or are perceived, but whether you seek solitude or being part of a crowd, to recharge.

Horse Daughter is an extrovert. When she has spare time the last thing she wants is to be home in the still silence. No way! She wants to be out and about, doing stuff and seeing people. That is an extrovert. She recharges her batteries being out and about. She's an outy. I'm an inny.

Social interaction in this written form, allows me to communicate, which I enjoy, but I do not have to have people in my personal space to do it.

16 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 3:59 pm

Magdelan

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this is making me smile Uno, more familiar stuff. going by your description of introvert then I believe I am still the inny I thought I was. I have few friends nearby who I love but see seldom. Yet we don't need to see each other a lot to keep the connection going - guess they are really good friends :-). But I do need down time, quiet space away from everyone - kids and family - everyone which is why I find myself up at 3am on youtube sometimes. I love the peace and magic of the night.

I also like this kind of social engagement, you can tune in when you want and communicate at will, take time to contemplate (or not :-). I didn't think I'd be here as much as I am, didn't anticipate finding such a cool bunch of people actually. I love the knowledge and pioneering spirit and everyone who pulls off their remarkable lifestyles - Jack London would appreciate too maybe (keeping it literary)! Women who like to carry those pistol shotguns for grizzly bears, take pride in winning over the elements, led zeplin loving musically inclined, witty and sharp sofa king bad senses of humor and artsy crafty types, plus everyone loves their animals with a passion. And of course conversations like this. It is really a remarkable place to hang out I think. Would we have as good a conversation over coffee in a cafe? I don't know. maybe.

got to start on some banana bread - almost a truck load of eggs in the fridge!

17 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 4:06 pm

uno

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You've nailed it, Magdelan.

18 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 4:07 pm

Ruffledfeathers

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But now having said all of that I will read and think OMG how amazing I'm not the only one who manages to for a lack of better words experience life. To find the lesson, the comedy and the sadness that I can't relay it the same way some on here do. I love this forum and reading everybody's posts because I can feel the emotion in them. You share that humanity Uno and keep sharing it cause it happens to everybody, like you said you just have a way with words...
TBC... have to go pick up kids

19 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 4:55 pm

coopslave

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Magelan wrote:I didn't think I'd be here as much as I am, didn't anticipate finding such a cool bunch of people actually.

Told you......

20 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Jan 07, 2014 5:10 pm

Magdelan

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coopslave wrote:
Magelan wrote:I didn't think I'd be here as much as I am, didn't anticipate finding such a cool bunch of people actually.

Told you......

yeah :-)

21 Re: An essay on deleting. on Tue Mar 24, 2015 2:50 am

davidto113


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I am glad to have edit/delete back. I wouldn't have lasted long without them.

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